I know for a little while I was posting music on here but frankly the blog section is over saturated with liked minded folks and I'm not sure there was any place for my somewhat offbeat tastes. I'll link couple things that interest me at the bottom when I'm done If no ones interested I'll call it done.

Today I'm here to rant. I'm unhappy. Not manic or anything chemically controllable but just generally with all good reason depressed. Aside from the normal day to day stuff like getting by a truck a couple weeks ago I actually have a reasonable beef. I'm what's called a Network Support Engineer. I have complete ownship of 130+ CMTS switches, Fiber platforms distribution routers, Core routers, and 700,000 subscribers. Everything from phone, TV, and Internet.

Somebody called me last weekend because they needed some clarifications on required SNR % for Docsis 3.0. same day I was called because SIP stopped functioning to the voicemail platform. This morning I fixed a DHCP issue with improperly built subnet groups. Another day I had to teach someone how OSPF messaging functions. What I'm saying here is I'm a goddamn genius. I have to slowdown when I talk to people in my peer group. When people outside of technology ask me what I do I just say "Engineer" and let it go because it would take too fucking long to explain.

So here goes. I've run into three problems. One, I'm bored out of my skull. Nothing is really a challenge for me anymore or if it is it doesn't interest me. I don't give a fuck how solaris 10 stores email. Two, I'm so overqualified at this point everything comes to me EVERYTHING. Some of it's just my attitude. I'm johnny on the spot with everything once I even see a possible issue I take it own it and fix it. The problem is now I'm overworked I'm tired pushing 60 hours a week is getting old. Finally, I'm just not getting paid enough. Not for the effort I put in.

Now the depressing part. I applied for a better position. It's a type of design engineer. I had to interview with 8 people all VP's or engineer. Little bit more money but importantly it was something different and less oncall god help me. My sudo_boss called me in and told me I didn't get it. I'm Production and an unknown in the engineering group. Despite interviewing incredibly well or so they said. So it was suggested that if I wanted a starting point in design I should apply for the guy who got the job's position. I was a shoe in. I interviewed this time with 5 people. All surprised I even wanted the job. It was lateral if that. I was SUPREMELY overqualified so they said. Interviews went fine. Again I'm called in and told I didn't get it. They said though the position was below my current one they could not hire me because I don't have a college degree.

They say this to the guy who literally (not figuratively) runs the entire network. The hands of fire. My current actual boss was blown away. He'd already started looking at replacements for me.

So now like a goddamn 19th century irishman I'm a second class citizen living with the knowledge that until I have a 4 year engineering degree I'm undesirable at my own company. "Oh just go to night" Oh wait I work 60 hours a week oncall or not I have a wife a house and a life. I'm not spending 4 years and 10,000+ dollars to get a job making what I make now. I don't even have that kinda money. I'm still in debt from certifications.

I just don't know what to do now. I just feel like giving up. I've beaten like 5 games in the last couple weeks. Came very close to hooking the old SNES back up and just get bent for the next year. Show up put in my 8-5 and do something else with the rest of my life. I've never been told pointblank a piece of paper could keep me from doing anything. Tonight somebody hit me up on aim " I can't ping such and such from core blah" and I felt bad about it but I just told them to blow I wasn't on call not my problem.

Well anyway. If anyone's looking for someone who can do just about anything layer 1-5 advanced configuration, management, and troubleshooting let me know. I'm not cheap but worth every penny. I will transport the crap out of your traffic. FML

Sorry if these aren't original I just don't care anymore

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