Welcome to The Forum

Register now to gain access to all of our features. Once registered and logged in, you will be able to create topics, post replies to existing threads

So I'm Writing A Short Novel


EmberFrost
 Share

Recommended Posts

So yeah, I got bored and i decided to write a random short book on some random shit because I don't have anything better to do with my life :3

 

It's a random story bout some random hitman cuz i got bored and wrote it

 

This is just the first couple chapters, if you liked it let me know and ill release the others... Also open to suggestions on what to change, improve or add :)

 

 

 

The Hit

Chapter One

 

It was just another day in the small city of Loktav, I was in my gray rock house sitting on the red couch by the fireplace keeping myself warm. It was winter time and the breeze was blowing, the door was blockaded by the snow and i wasn't bothered to clear it out. I had nothing to do anyways. I had only one window which was opposite of the brown oak door, which was also frosted shut by the winter cold. It was more of a room than a house, I only had a fireplace, a red couch, a black tabletop screwed to the wall as well as my laptop and a cup of coffee. I had a small cupboard next to the table as well as the coffee maker plugged into the wall next to my laptop. I sat on my couch just staring at the white screen, contemplating about what I've done, and what I'm about to do.

 

Suddenly, a flash came from my screen. A name and a picture popped up on my display, a Caucasian man named Kane. His name was in a bold red font as well as his details. He lived in the metropolis town known as Jaykinsberg, what a generic name for a city. He was 24 years old with no wife and no kids, no relatives and both of his parents are deceased. He lived in a high rise skyscraper hotel on the top floor which was custom built into a penthouse just for him.

 

He was also the CEO of a big co-operation handling the distribution of all the Kronium throughout the entire city. Kronium was the most seductive drug used by men to force women to submit to their commands, the most profitable drug as the company held the secret to producing Kronium at the minimal price without reducing quality. They had no competition so they were a multi-trillion dollar industry. Made sense someone wanted him gone.

 

The person who wanted him gone was anonymous, probably someone within the company who can take over if Kane went... missing. He wanted it clean, no trace, the most expensive type of job. He paid a $500,000 fee upfront and said another $2,000,000 was waiting once the job was done. I stared at my cup of bland coffee as i knew how much i needed the money. I then faced towards my weapons, knowing that i shouldn't have spent the $1,000,000 i earned from my last hit on all the new equipment I had. A .90 Cal sniper rifle with a retractable chassis and a integrated maximum stealth suppressor, A 9mm golden plated, dragon engraved pistol, The angelic and demonic runes i got from the black market as well, told to hold powers unknown to man. I plan to use them all on the next hit.

 

I accepted the hit and the $500,000 was immediately transferred into my account, with that i booked a flight to the metropolis and withdrew the rest as. I packed my weapons into my duffel bag lined with carbon fiber aluminum to wave over security checks. I also packed some of my old equipment, my tripwires, motion sensors, heat vision goggles, night vision goggles, everything i thought i would need for the hit. I wore my standard black cardigan and pants as well as my mechanic suit in my bag. I shut the lid to my laptop and drank what was left of the coffee, extinguished the fireplace and made my way outside. I forced the door open, moving the three feet of snow that was pilled up. I locked the door and made my way to the airport.

 

 

 

Chapter Two

 

The plane departed at 7 pm, I had a small chicken sandwich on the plane to suffice my hunger. I even flirted with the stewardess on the plane to pass the time, she was cute. Susan... what a pretty name. Even though i had $500,000 in my pocket, I didn't want to be rolling in gold straight away, I needed to make sure this hit went right. I tried to spend as little as possible in case something drastic happened, I booked a small room in a trashy motel roughly 13 kilometers away from Kronium Palace, what a stupid name for a company. I did more research on the plane about this guy Kane. I like knowing as i can about my targets, makes the hits a lot easier.

 

He graduated high school at the age of 16 and finished collage by 20, He then married but got divorced after his wife filed reports of Kronium abuse. Typical, He does own the damn company after all. He had a degree in Biology and a masters at Chemistry, explains how me managed to develop Kronium. Digging deeper into his life i found out he was also been reported countless times for raping women using Kronium... After a couple hours of research into Kane and the drug Kronium I kept wondering, How is stuff legal? I then tumbled upon a police report in Jaykinsberg PD, stating that they have no interest in Kane's crimes... turns out they're the ones guarding Kronium Palace.

 

Damned corrupt police force, This'll make it harder to take the man out. But for two and a half million dollars, should be worth it.

 

The plane landed at Jeykinsberg International Airport at 3am in the morning. Everyone was tired, including the inspection team and the guards, which made it easier for my baggage to go unchecked. I walked to my motel considering it was only about a kilometer long, i didn't have much with me and I wouldn't trust no cab driver with my life at this time of day, especially when 42% of non natural deaths in Jeykinsberg was from drunk driving. However, That's about to change, as i was going to increase the number of deaths... through assassination. I grinned widely with this thought as i made my way to the motel. I wanted to get started straight away so I didn't go to sleep, i got the blueprints of Kronium Palace and started getting to work... There were roughly five entrances that i could take without getting scanned.

 

There was the front door, surprisingly, The back door for staff only, however that requires a key card to unlock the door. I could always parachute in with my stealth shoot, I know a buddy who could fly me over the building. I could climb the building using the K2-55 Hook on my mechanic suit. Now that i think about it, i could also use the underground sewers, which will definitely require the use of my suit as the stench down there would be ghastly. Not knowing what route I was going to take, I decided to fortify the room, electrify the door knob, no more unexpected visitors. Tapped into the surveillance of the motel, all cameras were outside, none in the rooms. Perfect.

 

The next morning I woke up extremely hungry, considering the fact i haven't eaten since 7pm and the clock was just about to strike 10am. I took a step outside the motel to see what places were available to dine in. The first place i saw was this small cafe, it was clean for a start which was enough to convince me to dine there. The cafe was rather small and had a few people inside, I sat on a small round table with a wooden chair next to it. I wanted to clear my mind as the day ahead shall be long and tiresome. I ordered a sweetened espresso as well as some eggs and bacon. Nothing beats a good breakfast and coffee in the morning. After stuffing myself with the fattening strips of bacon and egg, plus the pure sweetness of the bronze espresso. I leaned back on the wooden chair, savoring the taste knowing it won't come again for quite some time. My wrist watch beeped as i saw it was already noon, I paid in cash and set back for the motel, ready to commit the hit.

 

~~~

 

I just thought of this, Instead of me posting the next chapter. I'll let you guys decide what happens next! Sound good? You can include all crazy ideas in the comments if you wish and I'll include which ever one intrigues me the most. Preferably if you would start with how he would enter :)

 

If I'm bothered enough, I'll create chapters 3 and 4 from your comments :D

Link to comment
Share on other sites

can I get a tl;dr?

 

That's ok, I wasn't talking to you. Is it always your policy to tell people about the things you don't have the patience (or reading comprehension?) to digest? If so you must be very busy. There are a lot of people on reddit. I admire your dedication. Myself, I've never read War and Peace, or For Whom the Bell Tolls, among a few other things. I've read a lot of books, the list is probably too long to go into here... particularly with someone who can't make it through 6 paragraphs. Do you read books? Or do you get bored after the first couple of sentences? There's always comic books. They have a lot of pictures, but they do have some words as well. Some people turn their noses up at the comic book (or as it's referred to nowadays - the graphic novel) but not me. I figure a good story is a good story. There are plenty of ways to tell stories, and none are any more valid than others. But that's just my opinion. I'll bet you could read 6 paragraphs if you really put your mind to it. Maybe even more than that. If I were you, I would start small. Let's say you can read one sentence before you fall asleep - well that's a starting point! Gradually build your tolerance day by day. Push yourself to go one small step further each day. By the end of the week you'll be able to read half a page! By the end of the year, perhaps as much as a chapter. Remember to keep your goals achievable and to reward your successes. Within a few short years you might be able to tackle small books intended for children. And you may even develop the capacity to understand what it is you have read. Think of the possibilities! Of course all of this is moot if your intention was simply to be a dick. In that case I'm afraid all the practice in the world will still leave you a dick. Being a dick is like any other handicap. In fact, it can be worse than some. Consider that a man who lacks a leg can wear a prosthetic which functions very much like the leg he may have lost. But there's no prosthetic for your personality. You're stuck with what you've got.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

God I love these short novels with good plots and nice descriptions throughout the developed writing. I like how you are writing this and I personally think you should just let your own memories flow and write more instead of us telling you how to write it.

  • Like 1
Link to comment
Share on other sites

God I love these short novels with good plots and nice descriptions throughout the developed writing. I like how you are writing this and I personally think you should just let your own memories flow and write more instead of us telling you how to write it.

Thanks for the support! And thanks for the feedback as well!

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Join the conversation

You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.

Guest
Reply to this topic...

×   Pasted as rich text.   Paste as plain text instead

  Only 75 emoji are allowed.

×   Your link has been automatically embedded.   Display as a link instead

×   Your previous content has been restored.   Clear editor

×   You cannot paste images directly. Upload or insert images from URL.

 Share