NOMNOM Posted January 3, 2010 Share Posted January 3, 2010 George Bush, Queen Elizabeth and Vladimir Putin all die and go to hell. While there they spy a red phone and ask what the phone is for. The devil tells them it is for calling back to Earth. Putin asks to call Russia and talks for 5 minutes. When he was finished the devil informs him that the cost is a million dollars, so Putin writes him a check. Next Queen Elizabeth calls England and talks for 30 minutes. When she was finished, the devil informs her that the cost is 6 million dollars. Queen Elizabeth writes him a check. Finally, George Bush gets his turn and talks for 4 hours. When he was finished the devil informed him that there would be no charge for the call and feel free to call the USA anytime. When Putin hears this he goes ballistic and asks the devil why Bush got to call the USA free. The devil replied, Since Obama became President of the USA, the country has gone to hell, so it's a local call. PS: No matter what your political siding may be, you have to admit, you at least smiled. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
fdh Posted January 3, 2010 Share Posted January 3, 2010 Bill Gates dies and ends up before the Pearly Gates. Saint Peter looks at him and ponders a moment. "Bill," he murmurs, confused, "I am not sure I can let you in here." "Why not?" Bill asks, equally confused. "I'm Bill Gates, the man responsible for putting a PC in the homes of almost every American!" Saint Peter is about to answer when God appears abruptly. "Bill, you may be responsible for easing the lives of many with your PCs, but you are also resposible for Windows. But, since your sin and deeds do not outweigh each other, and I cannot decide what to do with you, I'll let you decide. I will let you tour Heaven and Hell, and you can make your decision. But first, hell." Satan appears in a puff of smoke. "Follow me," he says. Baffled, Bill does so, and the two vanish. In hell, Satan shows Bill thousands of nude beaches filled with women playing volleyball, and all wanting Bill to join. "Wow, if this is hell, I really want to see heaven," Bill says excitedly. So Satan returns him for the second half of his tour. In heaven, God shows Bill many gold-paved streets, lined with white-robed souls playing harps, or walking quietly. Bored, Bill says, "Frankly God, I think I'll chose hell." Two days later, Satan stops by Bill to see how his whipping is proceding. "How are things going, Bill?" he asks aimiably. "Satan," Bill starts, jerking against his chains as the demon behind him whips him again. "What happened? I mean, when I came down here, there where nude beaches, women, volleyball... where'd it go?" Satan thinks for a second, the remembers the tour he gave. "Oh, that?" he chuckles, "That was just a demo." Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
CubanCarlos Posted January 3, 2010 Share Posted January 3, 2010 George Bush, Queen Elizabeth and Vladimir Putin all die and go to hell. While there they spy a red phone and ask what the phone is for. The devil tells them it is for calling back to Earth. Putin asks to call Russia and talks for 5 minutes. When he was finished the devil informs him that the cost is a million dollars, so Putin writes him a check. Next Queen Elizabeth calls England and talks for 30 minutes. When she was finished, the devil informs her that the cost is 6 million dollars. Queen Elizabeth writes him a check. Finally, George Bush gets his turn and talks for 4 hours. When he was finished the devil informed him that there would be no charge for the call and feel free to call the USA anytime. When Putin hears this he goes ballistic and asks the devil why Bush got to call the USA free. The devil replied, Since Obama became President of the USA, the country has gone to hell, so it's a local call. PS: No matter what your political siding may be, you have to admit, you at least smiled. HAHAHAHA thats really funny! i lol'd and so did my family. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
wild bill Posted January 3, 2010 Share Posted January 3, 2010 i hated it *kills self* Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
scatteR Posted January 4, 2010 Share Posted January 4, 2010 both were rather amusing Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LaMigra Posted January 4, 2010 Share Posted January 4, 2010 Bill Gates dies and ends up before the Pearly Gates. Saint Peter looks at him and ponders a moment. "Bill," he murmurs, confused, "I am not sure I can let you in here." "Why not?" Bill asks, equally confused. "I'm Bill Gates, the man responsible for putting a PC in the homes of almost every American!" Saint Peter is about to answer when God appears abruptly. "Bill, you may be responsible for easing the lives of many with your PCs, but you are also resposible for Windows. But, since your sin and deeds do not outweigh each other, and I cannot decide what to do with you, I'll let you decide. I will let you tour Heaven and Hell, and you can make your decision. But first, hell." Satan appears in a puff of smoke. "Follow me," he says. Baffled, Bill does so, and the two vanish. In hell, Satan shows Bill thousands of nude beaches filled with women playing volleyball, and all wanting Bill to join. "Wow, if this is hell, I really want to see heaven," Bill says excitedly. So Satan returns him for the second half of his tour. In heaven, God shows Bill many gold-paved streets, lined with white-robed souls playing harps, or walking quietly. Bored, Bill says, "Frankly God, I think I'll chose hell." Two days later, Satan stops by Bill to see how his whipping is proceding. "How are things going, Bill?" he asks aimiably. "Satan," Bill starts, jerking against his chains as the demon behind him whips him again. "What happened? I mean, when I came down here, there where nude beaches, women, volleyball... where'd it go?" Satan thinks for a second, the remembers the tour he gave. "Oh, that?" he chuckles, "That was just a demo." Lmao that's a good one Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Staisys Posted January 9, 2010 Share Posted January 9, 2010 Satan thinks for a second, the remembers the tour he gave. "Oh, that?" he chuckles, "That was just a demo." Looks like he has to buy the full version. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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